Please note that all case studies are not direct from specific couples or individuals and are made up from merging ideas of models of treatment taken from the practitioner. Therefore, any similarities are purely coincidental.
Joe is a 35 year old man in a relationship with Pat for 7 years whom Joe lives with and they have no children. Joe works as a Clerk in a publications company, Pat works as a lawyer within a law firm.
Joe has had a history of volatility with periods of violence when a child and in his adolescence. Joe mainly blamed his volatility on drugs and alcohol abuse in his teens and early twenties. Joe prides himself on his abstinence and will power. For abstaining for many years and continues to gain support from various support groups he attends.
He very much sees himself as someone who always gets what he wants and the leadership role, including playing as a musician within his band with friends where he is the front man because he is both charismatic and an extrovert.
Pat described incidents where Joe had become more enraged, although not violent to her sometimes verbally aggressive. It was also old concern to Pat that Joe exhibited involuntary rage at when driving, shopping and general encounters with some of their family and friends. Pat felt from a legal point of view that it was only a matter of time before he got into trouble as there were a couple of near misses, particularly at work where he had been given several warnings for being aggressive and obstinate and dismissive of his colleagues and including managers.
When Joe first attended he felt reluctant feeling that to some extent he was badgered into coming as there was no real problem other than those who were annoying him.
In the course of the therapy Joe spoke about people not listening or taking him for granted, this happened as a child, also that he had not lived up to some of the expectations he had set himself and felt shamed by his current position of being a clerk whilst his partner was a lawyer. Joe most of all wanted others to respect and to acknowledge him and felt dismissed, abandoned and not good enough when he felt challenged.
Through therapy Joe was able to understand how to change the way he thought of himself and to accept that he also self sabotaged how he wanted to be seen. Soon Joe started to adapt different pathways that were positive for him. He learnt coping mechanisms and techniques to manage his anger. He built new positive experiences with others and seen in a more positive light by others but mainly by how he saw himself.
If this case study resonates with you then contact me to find out how I can help you deal with these issues.